Birthday Boy

• loiters around stables
• fully grown king man-child insists everyone celebrates his birthday in their own homes
• doesn’t even turn up to open presents
• causes millennia of war atrocities committed in his name
• now you have a dying tree in your house

And we all know how the “I was only following orders” defence goes down in the Hague…

Do you think the Christmas gods would relent this year if we just offered up a small fortune to Mariah?

Is this another story trumped up by JD Vance, because it’s the only positive news narrative their campaign has had in months?

Bonus if he only realises after he’s written his tirade and hits send.

Even better, the only letter that posts for Trump is “h”