Where I’ll watch 10 hours of YouTube and get paid enough to afford several days of… “pleasure”.

My cat sticks her snout in my mouth if she wants face smooches.

My hairline directly correlates with sales at the grocery. When I wake up bald, I know I’m eating good that night.

No fuck yuWu

Hey, you better take this meme and throw it in the fucking trash. Harambe was a gentle and kind soul. Gorilla was his final incarnation and his soul now rests in nirvana.

Java feels like McDonald’s and python feels like a grocery store.

Rust feels like a femboi hooters where they offer IVs you don’t think they’re qualified to administer.

You don’t just wear hoodies every day all year?

Wiping your ass is a Democrat conspiracy to make you deprive your body of a critical microbiome that protects you from their propaganda.

Slurp up the cow farts for fuel

I’m always erect

5 in the pink, 3 in the stink

Need to let more hunters inside you to shoot their shot

My brain just assumes everything is trauma and doesn’t store anything

I keep trying to make friends with skinwalkers but they run away when I try to hug them.

I wish I hadn’t needed to learn these lessons about start ups by working in start ups. I just want to be a mailman or something at this point.

When you pour motor oil in the water is makes a pretty rainbow and turns the river gay. Everyone should be doing it!

What about my cat? She’s not the social revolutionary type.

I have a spreadsheet I put in price, calories, and macros. Tells me everything like cal/$ , each macro /$, but most importantly my final weighted value based on those things that gives me a rough “best” foods, with color scaling, that arent pure carbs.

9v batteries are actually 6x AAAA batteries in a little case.

I didn’t say it was dead.