It’s media-friendly astrology

Eye-mayge-een if the pronunciation of words mattered

Fuck that burger looks good

God I hate when meme formats are completely misused.

I have a hard time seeing the left guy being inside.

Bees?

Yes but unironically. My sense of humor should be accepted by the entire world.

Not that I have any room to throw stones in this glass house, but have you tried water?

Lemmy is my methadone. Not interesting enough to get me hooked but just enough to keep me from going back.

I swear even the memes on here belong in comedy homicide and I see maybe one interesting article per day at most. I started carrying a kindle with me and usually just read instead of browsing. I’ve gone from a book every 2 or 3 months to a book per week.

'tis a sad day when we’re so eager to shitpost that we can’t take 5 seconds to proofread our memes.

The cat doesn’t speak.

That’s just pretentious. Oh your magic stick was exactly two pounds? The only right answer is “a little bit less than 1/4 pound”? Your stick weighted about 2 pounds, the pieces weigh about 1/4 pound. Get your wonderland shit out of here Lewis.

It’s so hot, I poured McDonald’s coffee on my lap to cool off.

holy fucking shit. Brian’s hat just got him in huge trouble in a meeting. Mr Andrews made Brian take off his hat. He said it was distracting. He said if anyone disagreed, he’d let Brian keep the hat on. Nobody said shit dude. Nobody said shit.