Break the German enigma machine!
“It doesn’t work like that.”
…SUDO BREAK GERMAN ENIGMA MACHINE.

This was a really sad movie, especially when he found out about sudo in the end.

You wouldn’t think it was possible to eat fifty spring rolls, but they put a man on the moon. Anything is possible.

The last windows user defends their ad riddled bloat machine from the evil clutches of the Linux horde.

That’s correct. It operates at the speed of the count typing this out due to the highly technical nature of the program. There is also no limit so you could put ten billion in there for example.

This is why I wrote bat_count.py. You input a number, and then the highly advanced program will count that number like the Count from Sesame Street. Example output for 3:
One…one bat.
Two…two bats.
Three! Three bats. Ah ah ah ah!

Please provide your address, email address, phone number, and a scan of your ID card to activate Linux.

“Think about it. They drained a lot of oil in the Middle East, so there must be cool underground lakes of oil you can paddle around in down there.” -Gas station geologist

Can I bike across the interstate?
“There are many ways you can epicly jump 6 lanes of traffic”

Always check for infinite cat girl errors.

HML Enterprise is extremely reliable for banking operations…probably.

I’m a total newbie to Linux, but why do people dislike Ubuntu?

Pokémon Kentucky

99.99 uptime!? Lies! Deception!

I just called Microsoft and their support line confirmed that they are, indeed, a banana.

Thou shall not make a machine in the likeness of a human mind.

Sir-SIR. As I explained you need to change trains.
(Unprofessional screeching)
SIR. Let’s keep this civil.

She’s my…accountant.

Oh! This one jar that is freakin stuck super bad.