It is sort of readable. A switch is “perfectly” readable for switching.

There is usually a safer and more readable way to do what you want to do by chaining ternaries in most languages.

I didn’t mean it as a flex. It was a commentary on how the most commonly used programming language in current days is just as flawed as the most commonly used programming language in the past (in web development). Bad programmers are going to write bad code, regardless of the language.

JS is just popular because Google invests so much money into it to use it to make the web worse off.

How about “php enables me to code like a moron”, or even better, "php breaks common conventions and forces me to think about every little detail and special edge case, slowing me down if I don’t want to accidentally ‘code like a moron’ "

Nested ternary operators emerge because of the lack of if/switch expressions (which is C fault), so they are “useful” (they shouldn’t be). However, PHP is the only language that treats it as left associative. This has 2 problems:

• You are forced to use parenthesis. Some (insane) people might do: (cond1) ? “A” : (cond2) ? “B” : “C” And it makes sense. Its ugly af, but it makes sense. But PHP now forces you to use more parethesis. It’s making you work more.
• It breaks convention. If you come from any other language and use ternary operators, you will get unexpected results. After hours of banging your head against the wall, you realize the problem. And now you have to learn a new edge case in the language, and what to do to actually use the language.

“But you shouldn’t use ternary operators anyway! Use if/switch/polymorphic dispatch/goto/anything else”

True, but still, the feature is there, and its bad. The fact that there are other alternatives doesn’t make the PHP ternary operator worse than other languages’ ternary operator.

PHP works against you. That’s the problem. The ternary operator is not a good example, since there are alternatives. But look at something so simple, so mundane like strpos.

If strpos doesn’t find returns false. Every other language returns -1. And if you then use this value elsewhere, PHP will cast it to 0 for you. Boom, your program is broken, and you have to stare at the screen for hours, looking for the error.

“BuT yOU sHoUlD AlwAyS cHEcK tHe rETurN eRRor!”

And even if that’s true, if we all must check the return value, does PHP force you to do so? Like checked exceptions in Java? Or all the Option & Result in Rust? throws, throws, throws… unwrap, unwrap, unwrap… (Many) people hate those features

PHP works against you. And that’s why its bad.

But if you code like a moron the code should still behave as expected. People who code like this deserve a special place in hell, next to languages that behave like that.

I say that php breaks math entirely, and is therefore bad. “” == null returns true null == [] returns true “” == [] returns false.

In more recent versions it gets worse, because it has 0 == “any text” return true, “any text” == true return true, and 1 == true return true So indirectly 1 = 0, and now math is more directly broken.

Absolutely, many languages do allow negative indices. The intriguing part about PHP, though, is that its ‘arrays’ are actually ordered maps (or hash tables) under the hood. This structure allows for a broader range of keys, like our negative integers or even strings. It’s a unique design choice that sets PHP apart and allows for some really interesting usage patterns. Not your everyday array, right?

“Shot myself in the foot? No, no. I took out the whole leg.”

Not nested but ‘Unparenthesized’

Also per the error message here is it working:

I’d wager prevalence is part of their problem. Jokes get tired after a while, but that doesn’t always mean they stop.

PHP, like any language, has its problems, but it seems to get poked at a lot more often. But making the same joke over and over has been a problem long before reddit was a thing.

PHP gets a totally disproportionate share of hate and that is the problem. Children like to dunk on PHP and a group mentality pushes it even more.

The title of this post is calling php a “meme” did you read that part? Then it just uses some stupid ternary example no one does and that other languages exhibit so what is the point other than purely hating on php?

no clue what your point is.

You don’t know many languages, huh?

It’s cause PHP associates the if-then-else pair only with its immediate “else” option, not with the entirety of the line.

Let’s go by parts.

$a == 1 ? "one" : $a == 2 ? "two" : $a == 3 ? "three" : "other"

Is $a equal to 1? If so, we’re “set” to the value on the left, which is "one", if not then we’re set to the value on the right, which is $a == 2. $a is not equal to 1, so we’re set to the right value, $a == 2.

This replaces the relevant part, $a == 1 ? "one" : $a == 2, with $a == 2. So we’re left with:

$a == 2 ? "two" : $a == 3 ? "three" : "other"

Next, is $a equal to 2? If so, we’re set to "two", if not we’re set to $a == 3. The comparison is true, so we’re set to the value on the left, "two". The relevant part here is $a == 2 ? "two" : $a == 3 only, so it replaces it with "two" cause again, PHP is only associating with its immediate pair. So now we’re left with:

"two" ? "three" : "other"

Finally, is "two" truthy? If so, we’re set to "three", if not we’re set to "other". Since "two" is truthy we’re then left with "three".

It’s super confusing for sure.

Yep, any non empty string is truthy.

Ah, I understand now. The expression is evaluated like this:

• $a == 1 ? "one" : $a == 2 ? "two" : $a == 3 ? "three" : "other"
• $a == 2 ? "two" : $a == 3 ? "three" : "other"
• "two" ? "three" : "other"
• "three"

If you think PHP is weird, go look up ZZT-OOP, the scripting language from Tim Sweeney’s first game.

(No, a scripting language for game characters doesn’t need integers. If you need to count, you can do that by moving blocks around on the game board. It’s halfway between LOGO and Minecraft.)

Yes, PHP was originally meant to be a template language, like handlebars or thymeleaf, but kept on accumulating features along the way…