• ITGuyLevi@programming.dev
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      7 days ago

      I’ve kicked myself in the ass over that decision a lot over the years. It’s far behind me now, but I still kinda regret it.

  • mub@lemmy.ml
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    6 days ago

    Came here looking for someone saying “face tattoo”. None so far.

  • Mulligrubs@lemmy.world
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    9 days ago

    Not having kids, every time I have any remorse I spend some time around kids and their parents, in about 5 minutes I’m good

      • 200ok@lemmy.world
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        8 days ago

        This is an interesting nuance. I find most children annoying, and I don’t want any of my own, but the love I have for my niece and nephew is bigger than I ever could have imagined.

        I guess there’s always room for exceptions.

        • Today@lemmy.world
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          8 days ago

          I hadn’t planned on kids or marriage. I’m so thankful to have both.

        • captcha_incorrect@lemmy.world
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          7 days ago

          There is truth in the saying “you won’t understand until you have your own”. The love I feel for my kids are like nothing else and nothing before it.

          With that said, I’d never tell someone they would regret not having kids. As much as I love them, they take ALL my time and then some. It is a very big investment of your time (years) and if you don’t want that, that’s cool.

    • ☆ Yσɠƚԋσʂ ☆@lemmy.ml
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      9 days ago

      Same here, having watched how the lives of my friends who had kids changed reaffirmed the decision of not having any for me. You basically have to be prepared to dedicate next couple of decades of our life to raising kids and not doing much of anything else. And you end up giving up the freedom to do things like move to a different town or try a new career. Your primary goal in life becomes having stable income to raise your kids.

      • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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        8 days ago

        The whole “not much of anything else” mellows out as they get older, and you can even share those interests with your kids. I loved the whole process of going to amusement parks with my daughter, watching her go from enjoying but also being terrified of the small ones, to getting used to those but doing the same for the medium ones, being nervous about going upside down, then seeing it wasn’t such a big deal and now loving the big ones as much as I do and we got to experience the most intense one I’ve ever ridden for the first time together.

    • zemon@lemmy.ml
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      8 days ago

      I’m in the same boat, except I’ve never felt any kind of remorse. How often do you feel it?

  • grue@lemmy.world
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    9 days ago

    My mom didn’t think I should buy a house. In 2009.

    I would have been absolutely screwed by now if I’d listened to her advice.

    • dmention7@midwest.social
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      9 days ago

      I had the opposite. In 2007 my mom convinced me it’s conventional wisdom to buy as much house as you can afford, because historically it is one of the best investments you can make.

      Thankfully all I could afford at that time was a pretty cheap house…

      • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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        8 days ago

        We went for a house somewhat below the maximum we could borrow, hardly cheap because nothing is cheap. But I am happy with it and don’t see any reason to move. I just want to pay off the mortgage and hopefully retire early. Why the fuck would I want to work years longer just to have a house that costs more?

        • captcha_incorrect@lemmy.world
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          7 days ago

          We also bought under our maximum budget at the time. Good call as well because my partner got sick and had to stay at home for a year. We had to use a lot of our savings that did not go into buying a house to pay our bills.

          • Ada@piefed.blahaj.zone
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            8 days ago

            Estrogen!

            Unfortunately, it will be my only colour tattoo, because I had a hell of time healing that one. My body has rejected all of my piercings over the years, and clearly didn’t like the colours either. It seems to handle blacks just fine though

            • felsiq@piefed.zip
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              8 days ago

              That sucks, but if you can only have one color tattoo that seems like the perfect choice even if you didn’t know that going in lol

              I’m not normally a fan of tattoos (pretty ambivalent overall) but I really like that one and the added meaning for anyone more up to date on their ochem than I am is even cooler 😂

          • Ada@piefed.blahaj.zone
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            8 days ago

            I started playing in 1989, I’ve played every edition and even got published in a couple of the sourcebooks, so it was a good choice for a tattoo :)

            I had a friend tweak it though so people who know Shadowrun will recognise it, but it doesn’t look like a logo to people who don’t recognise it

    • SharkWeek@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      8 days ago

      Oh lordy yes, tattoos … my mother drilled it into me when I was a kid that only prostitutes had tattoos, and I took that negativity on board in a weird way.

      I got my first tattoo a couple of years after I’d finished doing regular sex work

    • czl@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      9 days ago

      Cons: you don’t know what you’re missing Pros: you don’t know what you’re not missing

    • fizzle@quokk.au
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      9 days ago

      I don’t begrudge anyone not wanting kids. It’s not for everyone.

      That said, my first thought when I saw the post title was “I don’t regret having kids”.

      I suppose the caveat is that my twins are only 2 and a half, I may well regret having kids when they start getting pregnant, selling drugs, marrying chat bots, that sort of thing.

      Edit: I just scrolled through some of the other comments and noticed that the majority of them say that they don’t regret not having kids. The fediverse is pretty homogenous I guess.

      • kindnesskills@literature.cafe
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        9 days ago

        Were you told you would regret having your kids? That’s wild.

        It’s a lot more common for people to be told that they will regret not having kids, than being told they’ll regret having them… so I think the similarities in the responses is quite natural, dont you? Not a lot of parents can answer this post with their kids in mind, but pretty much every voluntarily childless person can.

        • fizzle@quokk.au
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          9 days ago

          It’s a lot more common for people to be told that they will regret not having kids, than being told they’ll regret having them

          That’s not my experience, at all.

          When I was in my 20s plenty of older guys would tell me not to have kids. Admittedly, these were the older weirdos hanging out at bars, but the source of the advice isn’t really in question right now.

          • kindnesskills@literature.cafe
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            9 days ago

            Every single voluntarily childless person I’ve spoken to have had the experience of being told they’ll regret it.

            I can only recall two people being told they’d regret their decision to have kids… and they were both teenagers, so even though I don’t agree with saying something like that, I can understand the sentiment of wanting them to wait a few years.

            Seems we life in very different worlds.

        • fizzle@quokk.au
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          9 days ago

          In my own case, it’s certainly been one of my life’s great adventures. The most meaningful thing I’ve ever done.

    • GriffinClaw@lemmy.zip
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      8 days ago

      This is the mantra of the family I married to. Sometimes a little too much.

      Still love them though:)

    • Buddahriffic@lemmy.world
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      8 days ago

      A variation of this that I realized fairly recently is that striving for excellence doesn’t mean the journey towards it is garbage. I can both feel pride in what I’ve done while also acknowledging where it could have been better with the intent to either circle back and do it better in the future (for like house projects) or avoid that mistake next time (for creations).

      Like I did a cross stitch of a wolf and it skewed a bit because it had a lot of half-stitching (without going into too much detail, a full cross stitch equalizes the forces the threads put on the canvas while a half-stitch puts an uneven force on it). So for my current one, I got hoops that I previously didn’t think I needed, which hold the canvas in place outside so the threads are less likely to put a high force where they are.

      And my next one will involve a better ordering strategy because my fairly random approach caused some areas of the canvas to bunch up more than others. Less noticeable than the wolf’s skew, but still a flaw I’d like to fix going forward but I’m not beating myself up about the current one.

      Assuming this is even relevant to the context you mean lol.

  • Waldelfe@feddit.org
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    7 days ago

    On my 5th birthday my parents threw a party for me with friends from kindergarten. My father had a pretty good camera for the time and loved taking photos. This was during analog times, way before digital cameras, so you wouldn’t just take a bunch of photos because it got expensive. He wanted to take a group photo and I, always being a little annoyed back then with the constant photos, stuck out my tongue. He tried to make me smile but I refused. So he told me he’d take the photo of me sticking out my tongue and I’d regret it when I’m an adult that I don’t have a nice photo of me on my 5th birthday. I’m 40 and I don’t regret it. Love that photo.

    • 1D10@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      When I was a kid I went through the boxes that held all the family photos and threw away the ones of me, there is now very little physical evidence I existed at all up in till the mid 90s.

  • cheers_queers@lemmy.zip
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    8 days ago

    getting a hysterectomy. this last year has proven that my foresight was indeed correct, the post right above this one is an article about the government planning to reduce or remove access to contraceptives, and no way in hell is anyone gonna make me be pregnant. i was extremely lucky to find a surgeon who would do it since i have no kids and was under thirty at the time.

    • SirEDCaLot@lemmy.today
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      8 days ago

      It is extremely concerning how many surgeons are happy to sterilize men on request, but push back HARD when women ask. I’ve talked to several women in this exact situation, it’s like if you’re under 30 and don’t have 5 kids you must not have any idea what you want and you lose agency over your own body. One friend who wanted this had surgeons demanding a permission slip from her husband. What the fuck? Does her body belong to him? I find this situation abhorrent. Your body your choice end of story. And if you regret the consequences that’s on you, not your doctor. And SHOULD NOT BE your doctor’s job to dictate your life plans

      • DudleyMason@lemmy.ml
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        8 days ago

        As a man who’s been very sure he wanted to remain childfeee since his teens: most surgeons won’t sterilize men on request either. I was told several times to come back after I was married with at least three kids. Had to move to the literal opposite corner of the country to a place where Planned Parenthood isn’t under constant assault to get a vasectomy after decades of chasing one.

        • SirEDCaLot@lemmy.today
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          7 days ago

          Wow. That’s unreal. If I may ask were you trying to do a vasectomy (which can often be reversed) or something more permanent?

          • DudleyMason@lemmy.ml
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            7 days ago

            A vasectomy, mostly. I did try to get into some studies for things like IVD, but that never materialized either.

            I was shocked at how easy it was when I got to the NW and just…walked into a Planned Parenthood and scheduled the appointment.

            Florida in the late 90s/early 00s was very “unreal”, but it’s gotten worse every time I’ve gone back to visit.

            • SirEDCaLot@lemmy.today
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              7 days ago

              There was a quote something like no matter how bad life gets religion can always be counted on to make it worse.

      • cheers_queers@lemmy.zip
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        8 days ago

        my surgeon has your mindset and i trust her with my life. she also said if i decide to start T she manages transgender care as well. a few months ago i even saw her on a youtube ad advocating for womens rights and body autonomy. i just hope she doesnt leave the area, as a lot of doctors do here.

  • tenchiken@anarchist.nexus
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    8 days ago

    “stop wasting time with that Linux thing. Nobody will ever hire you unless you specialize in Windows”

    Linux has done far more for me professionally than being a Windows engineer ever got me, and it repeatedly keeps being proven.

    • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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      8 days ago

      Wish I could say the same, so far Linux knowledge seems to have done very little for me as far as employment goes. I have used it at work before but normally it isn’t something anyone else seems to care about. At least my limited knowledge of Windows hasn’t been too significant of a problem so far either.

    • lichtmetzger@discuss.tchncs.de
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      8 days ago

      I’ve been running some Linux servers for fun, at my last job we also had quite a few. The only admin quit, no documentation. Guess who got a big salary increase because he was the only one with the knowledge required to keep this shitshow running? Yep, that’s me.

      Thanks to past me for installing every distro under the sun and sinking years into the commandline, shell scripting, web and mail servers just for the thrill. Linux is awesome.

  • kreskin@lemmy.world
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    8 days ago

    Spending time playing video games. I enjoyed every minute and I didn’t miss out on much.